Archive for the ‘Love’ Category

B = Broken {All About Me}

This one is emotional for me.  A large portion of this story has been left out. I’m not yet ready to share it.

I chose broken because I feel like my body let me down.   It didn’t work as it should have.  I was healthy and in fairly good shape each time.  I’ve never broken a bone.  I’ve never had a long-term illness.  No high cholesterol, no high blood pressure, no issue really of any kind. 

Yet each time I got pregnant there were issues.  Big issues.  Enough to knock me off my feet and make me wonder why this had to happen. 

I don’t mean to complain or compare but it can be difficult. 

I hear stories all the time about kids being hurt, killed or neglected.  Several stories of people having more and more children they don’t want or can’t afford. 

All I ever wanted to be was a mom.  I was significantly older when I finally had a sibling so I grew up caring for him.  Learning how to be a mom and care for a baby was well developed before I had my own.

I love being a mom.  I think daily about how I can encourage my little sweetlings to live their dreams.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my sweet babies.  I love them more than anything in this world.  I wouldn’t trade them for the world…

but it still hurts that we aren’t able to have any more.  I’m disappointed in my body because I feel it has let me down.  Even though my husband has said he’s happy with our life the way it is I still feel as though I’ve let him down.

I’m slowly getting over this but it still hurts.  I’m always happy to hear when a friend is newly expecting but there is still a twinge of hurt.

This story does have a happy ending.  We have two beautiful babies of our own and the possibility of surrogacy or adoption in the future.

Each day I thank God for what I have.  I’m so thankful my babies are here.  I promise to enjoy them to the fullest and love them with my whole heart.

None of this compares to those that have never had their own.  I know how blessed I am to have what I have.  I pray for those that so desperately want a child.  There is always a rougher story but this is mine.  I’m working my way through it!

Join up with us next week with Love Kate for the All About Me A-Z challenge. 

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Into the Word Wednesday {What it means to be free}

It’s the freedom of our country, the freedom of our people, freedom to be anything we want to be, to own a business if we so choose, to live where we’d like, raise our children as we wish…

I went searching through the word this week looking for verses about freedom.  This verse really stood out to me.

You will soon see that the title of this isn’t even really what this ends up being at all.  Freedom and Independence Day is what I wanted to post about yet I was led in a very, very different direction.

We are called to be free.  It is our right to be free.

Now I don’t know the bible by heart.  I know some verses of course but I’m no biblical scholar.  I’m working my way through learning more right now as I’m a work in progress. I didn’t know the next verse would change my entire post.  I didn’t know that the next verse would be blog post changing.

I hadn’t planned on talking about this at all but here we go….

Love your neighbor as yourself, love your neighbor as yourself, love your neighbor as yourself.  These words keep resonating in my mind.  Have I been loving my neighbors?  Have I taken the time to get to know people, help others, show my compassion?

I really haven’t.  I’ve been so wrapped up in my own despair, my own worries the past year or so I haven’t done much for anyone else.  Of course I’m still a wife and mom but there are many more ‘neighbors’ in my life.

However He has opened my eyes to see that in all this I was already loving my neighbors and they were loving me back.  I just found this verse only just last night yet in the past eight weeks I’ve been changing.  Looking outside myself.  Really seeing how I can be a blessing for another.  I didn’t realize I was doing it.  I’m not mentioning it here to brag about it.  I want to share so you too can see how you may in fact be changing even when you don’t see it!

I’m mentioning it because in the past eight weeks a TON has happened yet I was too worried about other things to see it happening!

  • I met an extraordinary group of ladies through my Good Morning Girls bible study group. Praying for them has been really eye-opening. They do not live in close proximity to me at all but I feel as we’re growing as close as neighbors.  I’m loving them from afar.
  • I made several new friends that do live near me and I’m slowly becoming close with them.  What I find interesting is that even though I’m struggling with my own issues each of these ladies is battling something much more dire in their lives.  I believe they were brought into my life to show me that things could be much worse.  It doesn’t belittle anything my family is battling but it is showing me that if I can muster up half of the strength these ladies have then I’ll be okay!!
  • I’ve started this blog, learned a lot about myself, grown by leaps and bounds.  Made a ton of new blogger friends that have shown me that there is no reason to be afraid of making friends, online or in real life.  Each one has been helpful and sweet in their own way.

So on this Independence Day in 2012…how have you loved your neighbor today?  Have you been doing it all along but were too overwhelmed to see it?  I would absolutely love to hear about it.  It’s amazing what we see when we free our eyes and heart to really ‘see’.

 

–Join my co-hostesses and I this week for Into The Word Wednesday!

Becky at Tales of Beauty for Ashes

Sarah at Fontenot Four

Falen at Upward Not Inward

Kelly at Exceptionalistic (looks like you found me!)

Into the Word Wednesday blog hop rules (if you wouldn’t mind!):

1. Link up about something you are learning this week.

2. Follow all hostesses via GFC.

3. Grab a button to put on your blog – the more the merrier!  Check out our sweet new button…

Tales of Beauty for Ashes

4. Check out (and comment) other people’s blogs to bless them today!

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