Archive for the ‘Thankful’ Category

B = Broken {All About Me}

This one is emotional for me.  A large portion of this story has been left out. I’m not yet ready to share it.

I chose broken because I feel like my body let me down.   It didn’t work as it should have.  I was healthy and in fairly good shape each time.  I’ve never broken a bone.  I’ve never had a long-term illness.  No high cholesterol, no high blood pressure, no issue really of any kind. 

Yet each time I got pregnant there were issues.  Big issues.  Enough to knock me off my feet and make me wonder why this had to happen. 

I don’t mean to complain or compare but it can be difficult. 

I hear stories all the time about kids being hurt, killed or neglected.  Several stories of people having more and more children they don’t want or can’t afford. 

All I ever wanted to be was a mom.  I was significantly older when I finally had a sibling so I grew up caring for him.  Learning how to be a mom and care for a baby was well developed before I had my own.

I love being a mom.  I think daily about how I can encourage my little sweetlings to live their dreams.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my sweet babies.  I love them more than anything in this world.  I wouldn’t trade them for the world…

but it still hurts that we aren’t able to have any more.  I’m disappointed in my body because I feel it has let me down.  Even though my husband has said he’s happy with our life the way it is I still feel as though I’ve let him down.

I’m slowly getting over this but it still hurts.  I’m always happy to hear when a friend is newly expecting but there is still a twinge of hurt.

This story does have a happy ending.  We have two beautiful babies of our own and the possibility of surrogacy or adoption in the future.

Each day I thank God for what I have.  I’m so thankful my babies are here.  I promise to enjoy them to the fullest and love them with my whole heart.

None of this compares to those that have never had their own.  I know how blessed I am to have what I have.  I pray for those that so desperately want a child.  There is always a rougher story but this is mine.  I’m working my way through it!

Join up with us next week with Love Kate for the All About Me A-Z challenge. 

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Totally worth the work.

In case you were grossed out by this… I had to come back to show you the drastic difference.

I complained for the few days it took to clean up all that nastiness from the cover breaking but it was totally worth it!

Look at the payoff!!  Beautiful!  So inviting….and in this 102 degree heat we’ve been having I am SO thankful we’ve been able to use it!!

I’ve really been working on being thankful even in the things I do not like to do.  I’d love to hear what your least favorite chore is and how you feel when it’s done!

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Being thankful in the mundane.

Being thankful in the mundane has been running through my head these past six weeks.  It’s been a recurring theme during this Proverbs 31 bible study.  Remember that it is He you are serving, He you are glorifying. 

In all the wildness of being a wife and mom it’s hard to feel the joy in washing mounds of laundry, sweeping crumby floors and changing dirty diapers.  I’ve really been trying to make an effort in praising these seemingly monumental tasks set before me each day. 

‘Thank you Lord that I have a house to clean, a roof over my head and a bed to sleep in.  Thank you so much Lord that I have a washer and dryer to clean my clothing when I so choose. Thank you that I send my children to bed with full bellies even though most of it ends up on the floor!

I thank you Lord for the massive amount of toys I pick up each day because the pitter-patter of little feet is something I prayed for relentlessly for months on end.  I will remember I don’t get to pick and choose the best parts of this life I chose.  It comes as a package deal.’

Is there something in your life you are really dreading?  Something that causes a screaming, writhing, fist-pounding fit inside?

Might I suggest looking at the alternative?  It has really aided me in remembering to be thankful for what I do have rather than wallowing in pity. 

Since I am still working on my thankful list I’d love to hear your thankful in the mundane prayers!! 

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