It’s definitely something you don’t forget.  The feeling.  The words.  The truth.  The pain.  The after.

I don’t think it’s talked about enough.  When it happened to me, I knew one person I could turn to.  We weren’t even that close but I knew her and knew she’d miscarried.

She ended up being my saving grace.

I didn’t need people to offer me their take on why it happened.  I certainly didn’t need to be told that it was probably God’s will.  Or the insinuation that my baby most likely had a deformity and this is why it happened.

What I needed was someone that would understand and listen.  I needed someone to be there for me and understand where I was during that time.

I needed to know that it was okay to grieve.  I needed to know that it was okay to be angry and joyful when my friends were all having new babies.   It was helpful to know that it was okay to hurt and be sad.

remembering

I’m not sure why it’s a topic that is not shared too often.  Since I went through it I talk about it all the time.  I want to keep those babies in the forefront of my mind. I don’t want to forget them.  They are part of my family even though they are in heaven.  We mention them in our prayers every single night.

I often think about how life would be different and that’s hard.  It’s not that I’m not happy with what I already have, I’m just still wonder what could have been.  What would they look like?  How would they get along with their siblings?  The questions are endless.

Are you still grieving a loss?  Do you have someone to talk with about it?  Is there someone in your life that can just listen to you vent? 

If not, please try to find one person you can share with.  It will be one of the most freeing things you’ll do to help you get over the loss.  Email me if you need to.  kelly (at) exceptionalistic (dot) com.  I’m happy to listen.  I understand and I’ve been there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

This post was written to honor my angel babies for National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

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4 comments on “remembering my babies

  1. Sarah VR

    Thank you for sharing your emotions. Everything you have said rings so true in my heart. Visiting from the fontenot four link up today to remember our angel babies!

    1. Exceptionalistic Post author

      Thank you for stopping over Sarah. It’s a pain that will never cease but the more I talk about it the better I think I handle it! Hugs to you!

  2. Sarah {the fontenot four}

    You are right – the subject is definitely not one that is talked about often enough. It is a very vulnerable time for someone experiencing loss. They need to know that they have people that they can turn to and not feel like they can’t talk about it because it’s “taboo”. Thank you for sharing your heart today. Remembering my babies along with yours. Thank you for linking up. Love you!

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