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Why Striving for Perfection Causes Missed Opportunities {Into the Word Wednesday}

I’m learning a little more each day that it’s okay that I am not perfect.  Learning slowly.  Really slowly.

I’d venture to say I’m a perfectionist.  I tend to want things to go my way, the right way, and the most efficient way.  I am a planner.  I am so much of a planner that any kind of impromptu activity makes me a little uneasy. 

Immediately I start thinking about how to nix plans to make room for this new, uninvited activity.  I have learned to adapt and know that striving for perfection can certainly cause me to miss opportunities.  I am not so rigid that I always miss them.  I just freak out a little bit at first!

I talked about it back here but last year on vacation we spent almost 4 hours feeding the birds.  These birds…

As I look at my life and how busy it’s been it’s okay not to be this exact idea of what I think I must be.  That every plan doesn’t have to go off without a hitch.  For instance, this post was supposed to be up yesterday.

It’s okay. (Gasp!)

If you are a perfectionist like me, take the time to step back.  Take time to enjoy the birds like we did on vacation last year.  It was completely unplanned but ended up being a highlight of the trip.  Had we forced ourselves to ignore the opportunity and do what we had planned, we would have missed out on all of this.  

Ephesians 5: 15-16 leads us right into the way we are to live our lives abiding by the ten commandments.  The words in this verse are exactly what I needed to be reminded of this week. 

‘Be very careful, then, how you live — not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.’ 

Making the most of every opportunity might not be my way of doing things.  It could be that He is putting something in my path that I need to pay attention to.  Something that I need to see.  An opportunity to follow Him and what He desires of me. 

I knew without a doubt that I needed some family time last night after a very, very long day at work.  It was a longer shift than I’m normally scheduled and then I got out 45 minutes past my scheduled time to leave.  I had seen my husband and kids for 15 minutes in the morning and by the time I got home it was 30 minutes until bedtime. 

They needed me.  I could see it.  I could feel it.  More importantly, I needed it. 

For an instance I was worried about not having this post up right on time.  I was concerned with something that didn’t matter as much as the hour of playtime with the kids (by letting them stay up late) followed by an impromptu in-home date night with my husband.  No offense to any of you but this was definitely something that our family needed last night.   

If I had powered through like usual checking items off my list, I would have missed out on some wonderful quality family time. 

I will definitely allow these opportunities interrupt my vision of perfection more often!

How about you? 

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–Join my co-hostesses and I this week for Into The Word Wednesday!

Becky at Tales of Beauty for Ashes

Sarah at Fontenot Four

Falen at Upward Not Inward

Kelly at Exceptionalistic (looks like you found me!)

Into the Word Wednesday blog hop rules (if you wouldn’t mind!):

1. Link up about something you are learning this week.

2. Follow all hostesses via GFC or Google +.

3. Grab a button to put on your blog – the more the merrier! Check out our sweet new button…

.

Exceptionalistic

.

4. Check out (and comment) other people’s blogs to bless them today!

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Interruptions Welcome!

So, many of you know the blog was down for a little under 2 weeks.

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What a nice blessing that turned out to be!

For the first ten minutes or so, I was almost panicked. Would people stop reading if/when it came back up? Would I get out of the flow and want to even start back up? 

The great news is I enjoyed not having the pressure of making sure a post was up.  Since then, I’ve slowed things down. 

Why? 

There is no reason to push, push, push.  I’ve found that writing has come easier and faster for me now that I’m more relaxed about it.  There is so much keeping-up-with-the-Jones’ even in blogging that it can be overwhelming! 

So, I’m saying no to too many obligations and yes to me! From now on interruptions are welcome in my life.  I’m okay with being forced to take a breather.  Especially since I apparently can’t just take a break on my own.

I know I am not the only one here.  Do you tend to take on too much?  Do you feel like you lack the time to do anything for yourself?  Are you too nice to say no? 

Let’s keep each other accountable! 

Pretend I’m interrupting your schedule, forcing you to take a break. 

What are you going to do this week that you want to do?  Read that again…what are you going to do that you WANT to do? 

Could it be taking a walk, reading a book, a nap, alone time, a project you’ve been wanting to start, or something else?

I’d love to hear what you are going to do. 

Mine started last night!  I started Insanity for the second time.  I feel great already (although a little sore).   Mostly because I want to get in shape but honestly because I needed something that is only for me.   

I want to know…

what are you doing for you this week? 

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Forced To Obey {Into the Word Wednesday}

So, if you follow along you know that the blog has been down for about two weeks.  It was mostly my fault for trying to correct something that I had no idea how to fix.  It’s all fixed up now and I’m back in the game.

At the moment I realized everything was gone, I almost panicked.  I was concerned about the numbers, followers, and most of all letting people down.  I link up with some other bloggers on a weekly basis.  I hated not being there to support and join in with them.

Then within about ten minutes I realized it was out of my control.  Once I calmed down and accepted that this had happened, I realized something.

I had been pushing, pushing, pushing.  I’ve been so busy lately with the kids, school, both jobs, the blog, photography, and a few other projects I’m working on.

The night the blog went down it all hit me.

It was time to slow down.  I’ve been stretched too thin and for far too long.

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I had been thinking I was doing too much for a while.  Yet, when each opportunity presented itself, I pushed on.  I continued to do what I thought was best rather than paying attention to what was being asked of me. 

Then a few days after the blog went down, it hit me.  This is my cue to make a change.  Actually it was less of a cue and more of a smack in the face and I needed it.  I was being forced to obey and it was exactly what I needed.

In the past two weeks this has happened:

  • I’ve rearranged my schedule at my part time day job.  I made the decision that I could do the days/times that worked for me and if I wasn’t needed in the management position then so be it.  Well, I’m still there because they don’t want to lose me and have the schedule I need to make my life work.  
  • I’ve picked up a few extra days at the night job here and there which will help pay for a few upcoming vacations. 
  • I’ve instituted ‘family Thursday’ which is our one full day per week that we will utilize for activities such as the zoo, museum, parks, or anything else that we feel like doing. 
  • I’ve gotten organized when it comes to blogging.  I remembered that I started this for me.  If I don’t feel like blogging multiple times per week to keep up with the professionals, then I won’t.  I’m not getting caught up in the numbers when I’m still so new to this. 
  • I’ve been more intentional with my family time.  It’s sacred and I’m not willing to give it up for a few extra dollars.  It’s not worth it.  I won’t get these years back and the kids almost seem to have grown several years over the past few weeks. 
  • I’ve become less stressed and more relaxed.  I’ve been able to enjoy my time off instead of dreading the next time I had to be at work.

Won’t you join me in taking a step back so we can hear what we are being asked to do? 

This life we are living needs to be the best one because it’s the only one.  It took the blog meltdown to catch my attention.  Oh, there were other signs but this one was out of my control because I could not fix it on my own. 

What has it taken for you to realize you weren’t being obedient? 

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–Join my co-hostesses and I this week for Into The Word Wednesday!

Becky at Tales of Beauty for Ashes

Sarah at Fontenot Four

Falen at Upward Not Inward

Kelly at Exceptionalistic (looks like you found me!)

Into the Word Wednesday blog hop rules (if you wouldn’t mind!):

1. Link up about something you are learning this week.

2. Follow all hostesses via GFC or Google +.

3. Grab a button to put on your blog – the more the merrier! Check out our sweet new button…

.

Exceptionalistic

.

4. Check out (and comment) other people’s blogs to bless them today!

Email

Guys Night {Matrimonial Monday}

It’s a night I tease my husband about because it’s funny to see him get so excited. 

Once a month his closest friends come to the house for a long, long night of video game playing and eating.  As they like to say, it’s epic.   They get together around 3pm and stay up until after midnight.  They enjoy it so much that they make a weekend of it once a year. 

I love it because I can hear my husband laughing and relaxing.   He is getting a well deserved night of fun with friends. 

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I personally love these nights and weekends.  Once the kids are in bed, I get to do all the things I don’t usually get to do.  I can watch my favorite shows that are backlogged on the DVR.  I can organize our room, edit pictures, or just sit and read.

Now, don’t get me wrong.  My husband and I love hanging out together. 

We love it so much that even on nights when we say that we’ll do our own thing, we end up spending it together. 

I chose this topic because I think it’s healthy to spend some time apart.  It doesn’t have to be days.  It can be just a few hours. 

I’ll be covering more on this topic in two weeks right here at Matrimonial Monday.  Be sure to check back!  

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Exceptionalistic



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Again {5 Minute Friday}

It’s the end of the night and we are all exhausted after a very full day.  A few of us have been to school, worked, and/or played. 

As we get closer and closer to bed time, it looks like a second wind has arrived.  Silliness makes an attempt to emerge one last time. 

As I try to corral the troops to the bathroom to brush some pearly whites I hear, “Tickle me, daddy.”

Three words that are hard to pass up.  Three words that delay bedtime at least ten minutes. 

Then I hear it.

It’s a sound that makes me smile.

A beautiful noise that I love to hear.

The sound of pure joy that shows up in the form of a belly laugh. 

Hearing the boys laugh and play with their daddy one last time before bedtime warms my heart.  It makes the stress drift away. 

It is a reminder that these days won’t last forever.  It is a realization that it’s okay to delay bedtime another ten minutes when we hear:

“Tickle me again!”

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Now, set your timer, clear your head, for five minutes of free writing without worrying about getting it right.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community..

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